Stephen's Den

As I have no doubt mentioned before, one of the perks of my job is I get to work with some very smart people. People who got degrees in pure mathematics because they were simply so geeky they couldn’t help themselves. So, what does a Maths geek do when he/she goes out into the workforce? Well, they program targeting systems for ships, perform calculations that allow us to know exactly where the bomb needs to be dropped, or, in the case of, George Dantzig (uber mathematics geek of the 1940’s) develop the simplex algorithm, for the very purpose of optimizing logistics for the US military during World War 2. Maths is sexy, and maths can kill.

So, it’s always exciting to have a discussion with one of the maths geeks at work. On Thursday, a colleague (who, I am told, actually has programmed some pretty dangerous stuff) showed me this cool construct which is his computer background: a Mandlebrot set. All the diagrams here, I drew myself.

Ok, so anyone can look at a Mandlebrot and say “wow, that’s pretty. But really, what does it mean? Why do mathematics geeks get all weak in the knees when they see one? Why doesn’t he have sexy women or cars on his background? To understand that, we need to delve deeper into the mathematics. Come on, join me, it’ll be fun, pretty and exciting.

Continue reading Complex Numbers

A few posts back, I promised more Barenaked Ladies. That’s the band, not actual ladies. BNL had quite a few popular songs, although most people don’t know all that much about them since most of their stuff is actually a little off the wall. One of their most popular songs was a quasi-rap called “One Week”. I recall with some fondness listening to my friend “V” singing along to the words:

How can I help it if I think you’re funny when you’re mad?
Trying hard not to smile, though I feel bad.
I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral.
Don’t understand what I mean?
Well you soon will.

Continue reading Ode to Automaticity

As a promotion for the upcoming Simpsons movie, a number of American 7-11 stores were converted into Kwik-E-Mart stores. The Kwik-E-Mart, of course, is a fictional store within the Simpsons’ universe. I, of course, just had to go and see what all the fuss was about.

TV plays such an important role in our lives and culture nowadays that anything like this, anything related to something we’ve seen on TV immediately grabs our attention. Love it or loathe it, we are all influenced by it even if, like me, you haven’t watched any TV in over a year.

I guess the very fact that this store exists is a commentary on the relationship between TV and culture, or at least American culture. You see, the Simpsons satire so neatly reflects the true nature of things that while I was at the store, I had a lot of difficulty telling the “fake” goods apart from the “real” ones.

Items such as Buzz Cola, KrustyOs, Squishees and, of course, donuts were all on sale. The store was thick with pundits all here to indulge in America’s favourite past time: buying stuff. I, of course, should be one to talk. I bought half a dozen suspiciously pink “Homer” donuts and a six-pack of “Buzz” cola.

Santa Monica: it’s something you hear about in movies (a number of movies have been shot there over the years). As a kid growing up in decidedly unglamorous South Africa, it was just as mystical and unattainable as Never-Never land. Yet, here I was, in down-town LA, winding my way through traffic on the right-hand side of the road, intent on soon arriving at this fabled place. We’d just been on a ride through Beverly Hills and Hollywood Boulevard and were about to make a stop at the place we were looking forward to the most. Santa Monica is famous for a few things: the beautiful beach, the pier sporting a large Ferris wheel and the beautiful Californian sunsets on the pier.

Continue reading Santa Monica Pier

Firstly, I should mention that this post involves some boring, geeky mathematics. Geometry to be precise. In da Vinci’s day, Euclidean geometry was the pinnacle of intellectual pursuit and you will find a great many interesting geometric shapes coded into his artwork. Shapes that now have conspiracy theorists practically frothing in delight.

For most of the drawing in this post I will be using something called “Scalable Vector Graphics” (SVG). You will only be able to see the cool animated images here if your browser supports SVG or you have the Adobe SVG plugin. Firefox supports SVG natively.

Continue reading Ellipse

Shortly after visiting the Grand Canyon we took another long tour out into the Nevada countryside. This time, we were headed just a little West of Vegas to a place called “Red Rock Canyon”. As the name suggests, Red Rock is known for its colourful rock formations. The image on the right was taken by Sarah and it has to be one of my favourites. It’s not just because it shows my best side, either. I love how the red, green, yellow, brown, blue and white all draw your eye out to the vast expanse of countryside. This place was just as formidably beautiful, if not as breathtaking as the Grand Canyon.

Continue reading Red Rock Canyon

It’s a common platitude used by health professionals, but as often is the case with platitudes, it’s true. In particular, we could probably all be diagnosed with a couple very mild forms of “personality disorder” at any given time. Why? Well, we all have a personality, don’t we? A disorder only relates to the degree these traits affect our lives.You see, we all have coping mechanisms we use to get by in the world, little techniques that have served us well in the past, things that we are good at, things that work. This is normal and these behaviours form a part of our personality (outgoing, shy, aggressive, passive etc). It’s only when these behaviours get in the way of our daily functioning that they are classed as a “disorder”.

Continue reading We’re all a little bit crazy

It may come as something of a surprise to some of you, but I have only been driving for around a year now. This time last year I was, rather embarrassingly, frantically working on getting my drivers license so that I would be mobile when I came out here to Texas. It makes sense that since most of my driving time has been spent here in the US that I have started driving like a Texan. The long straight roads and flat expansive spaces lend themselves to high speed. So, it’s not uncommon for people to be doing 10 miles per hour over the speed limit: 80 in a 70 zone, 70 in a 60 zone etc. This is the story about the time I got caught…

Continue reading Need for speed

Someone asked me recently “why do your parents call you ‘Bean’?”. Well, that’s a whole other post in and of itself, so I thought I could elaborate a little. “Bean” is a nickname of mine, one in a long line of many illustrious nicknames I have had over the years.

Continue reading By any other name

Today I did something I haven’t done in a very long time: I took a bath. No, don’t look at me like that, it’s not what it sounds like, what I mean to say is: I had a bath rather than a shower, as I normally do (regularly, with soap). I can’t remember when my last bath was, but it must have been at least 6 years ago, before I turned 21, because at around that age I moved into a place with no bath and never went back. It’s funny, I assumed that when I stopped bathing it went out of fashion the world over, but that’s decidedly egocentric of me, it just went out of fashion for me.

So, why did I take up this alternate approach to personal hygiene and (perhaps more pressing) why do you, gentle reader, absolutely have to know?

Continue reading Bath